My Day

 

My birthday, my one special day. The older I get the less of a hang up I have with making sure my birthday is perfect. Especially now that I share the same birthday week as my son. It seems far more important to make sure his day is more special than my own.

I do have an awesome memory of my last birthday with my brother. My mom would make sure that both of my brothers knew that my birthday was approaching. She would often even buy my gift from them to make sure it was just what I wanted. Last year, while we were eating at Oreganos, I was opening my present from my brother. Manny leans over asking what it was and looking surprised with the shirt that was wrapped inside. I had to remind him that the gift was supposed to be from him. We both laughed about it and went on with our lunch. Little did I know that that simple memory would bring a smile to my face and some peace a year from then.

This birthday was a very different day for me. Although the week was filled with so many fun activities, there was still something missing. Our family would always do at least one birthday lunch, if not travel somewhere out of town together. We did both of those things this year but without Manny. My heart ached the entire day. I couldn't shake away the heaviness in my chest. I have never in my life gone an entire birthday without hearing from my brother. It was yet another painful reminder of our new reality.